Junk Food Junkie

You know I love that organic cooking
 I always ask for more
 And they call me Mr. Natural
 On down to the health food store
 I only eat good sea salt
 White sugar dont touch my lips
 And my friends is always
 Begging me to take them
 On macrobiotic trips
 Yes, they are
 Oh, but at night I take out my strongbox
 That I keep under lock and key
 And I take it off to my closet
 Where nobody else can see
 I open that door so slowly
 Take a peek up north and south
 Then I pull out a Hostess Twinkie
 And I pop it in my mouth
 Yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. Natural
 Just as healthy as I can be
 But at night I'm a junk food junkie
 Good Lord have pity on me
 Well, at lunchtime
 You can always find me
 At the Whole Earth Vitamin Bar
 Just sucking on my plain white yogurt
 From my hand thrown pottery jar
 And sippin' a little hand pressed cider
 With a carrot stick for dessert
 And wiping my face in a natural way
 On the sleeve of my peasant shirt
 Oh, yeah
 Ah, but when that clock strikes midnight
 And I'm all by myself
 I work that combination
 On my secret hideaway shelf
 And I pull out some Fritos corn chips
 Dr. Pepper and an Ole Moon Pie
 Then I sit back in glorious expectation
 Of a genuine junk food high
 Oh yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. Natural
 Just as healthy as I can be
 But at night I'm a junk food junkie
 Good Lord have pity on me
 My friends down at the commune
 They think I'm pretty neat
 Oh, I don't know nothing about arts and crafts
 But I give 'em all something to eat
 I'm a friend to old Euell Gibbons
 And I only eat homegrown spice
 I got a John Keats autographed Grecian urn
 Filled up with my brown rice
 Yes, I do
 Oh, but folks lately I have been spotted
 With a Big Mac on my breath
 Stumbling into a Colonel Sanders
 With a face as white as death
 I'm afraid someday theyll find me
 Just stretched out on my bed
 With a handful of Pringles Potato Chips
 And a Ding Dong by my head
 In the daytime I'm Mr. Natural
 Just as healthy as I can be
 But at night I'm a junk food junkie
 Good Lord have pity on me