Reluctantly Dead

The blood on my hands is like drugs up my nose
 I've been confused for someone who's in control
 of all of the things that'll happen anyway
 So I'll just continue on the path that I hate
 Cuz I'm gonna find my way
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 I've been grabbing at sand just to watch it slip away
 I put both my hands up and I started to pray
 That you ain't like me
 And that you'd let me walk away
 But I'll understand it if you chose to kill me
 Would've probably done the same
 I Would've probably done the same
 
 You believe that they came here to protect you
 But see I would rather run cause now the law results in a death
 Won't you understand that you've got control
 See I'll be confused for someone you'll never know
 Cause all of those things were gonna happen anyway
 Somewhere within you lies the one that you hate
 Im gonna fuck myself today
 I'd rather fuck myself today (Yeah)
 You believe that they came here to protect you
 But see I would rather run cause now the law results in a death
 But you believe that they came here to protect you
 See I am not the one cause I will be reluctantly dead
 I'll never be alone again
 But do you realise you're my only friend
 I feel at home again
 Home again
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 I'll never be alone again
 But I felt that I'm my only friend
 I feel at home again
 Home again
 And this is all pretend
 You believe that they came here to protect you
 But see I would rather run cause now the law results in a death
 You believe that they came here to protect you
 But see I am not the one cause i will be reluctantly dead