Thank You

You gave me language as a gift, I turned it against you
 I was stupid, I was young, I was hanged by my Judas tongue
 You shouldn't give weapons to kids that don't know better
 I can't possibly understand that there's no such thing as forever
 For every letter in the alphabet
 You said connect 'em to a happy word, no matter how bad things get
 I did my best, but the pickings got slim
 Once I arrived at "X" and I had to think of synonyms
 Weight 'em against the antonyms, I was hanging with all the mannequins
 Who are on a constant search for a person's amputated limbs
 Almost offered up my own, trading in my arms and legs
 You said learn to express yourself if you're gonna stand for things
 I stood up with that expression, stood up against everything including you
 I was stupid, I was adolescent, but I had your lessons to cling on to
 And I want you to know how much it helped
 Considering everything that I'd gone through
 It was a period without periods, run on sentences were like binges
 I was a comma with no cause, a rebel with no clauseAnnotate
 Anxiety is no excuse once there's nothing left to separate
 We could have connected, but didn't
 I was ignorant, passed out on the spacebar
 The further we drifted apart the closer
 I came to realizing just how amazing you are
 Now that you're gone I'mma say it to the stars
 'Till my words knock worlds off their axes and the universe collapses
 Thank you for the matches, for the gift of fire
 For the wood and the axe, for whooping my ass
 For the wheel even if you didn't invent it
 For the impact that you had on me, it's epic, thank you for the effort
 For teaching me the ABC's even if I never make my way to "Z"
 Even if I never do for someone else exactly what you did for me
 Thank you
 I was a stupid son of a gun with initials carved into me
 I was a stray, a runaway, afraid someday you'd shoot me
 So I scratched off the letters with a pocket knife
 It's how I loss my way when I was tossed into the fray
 This is not my life, who am I kidding, it's a thank you note
 Disguised as a written apology for everything you taught to me
 So awkwardly I approach the open microphone with everything that I wrote
 Clear my throat, adjust the collar on my coat
 As I rock crowds, microphones and boats and then I stroke
 Whatever little ego I have left, I should have left it at the alter
 But I didn't cause I'm an idiot, self-deprecating author
 With a paperback edition that isn't worth a flip through
 If I don't give you the credit that you deserve
 You edited the words from the grave and beyond
 From the first sign of sun raise at dawn
 Till the moonbeam set blaze to my lawn
 The universe collapses on my front steps
 So we get to share in that moment, for just one moment
 And nobody's upset, there's no more anger, there's no more sunsets
 So I crawl back in the chamber, you can shoot me up
 You might as well, we had great communication before the tower fell
 Thank you for the matches, for the gift of fire
 For the wood and the axe, for whooping my ass
 For the wheel even if you didn't invent it
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 For the impact that you had on me, it's epic, thank you for the effort
 For teaching me the ABC's even if I never make my way to "Z"
 Even if I never do for someone else exactly what you did for me
 Thank you
 I'mma do my best, while you rest in peace