Blowing the Payload

A group of legendary warriors
 They're world-renowned
 Overwatch, bitch!
 Their power's known all around
 Pushin' on the payload
 Is part of their plan
 From Gibraltar, and then
 Hanamura, Japan
 Their power is tested
 Wherever they go
 Rockets, bullets
 You name it, bro
 They've never been stopped
 Or met their match
 A mission's arrived
 So heroes, dispatch!
 Hi, can you help me?
 My car's broken down
 The engine's all busted
 I can't get my ass around
 I need some friends to get
 My vehicle out of the traffic
 You guys look like the best
 With all your fancy fuckin' tactics
 Without hesitation, they begin the migration
 Reinhardt pushes from behind
 Traffic's redirected as Mei is unaffected
 By cars honking loudly combined
 Bastion transforms into a giant fuckin' turret and
 Blows all the drivers away
 Pharah flies up high and rockets start to fly
 As the overpass crumblin' okay
 Holy fuckin' shit
 That was a little overkill
 But what do you expect from the best?
 The phone's ringing off the hook
 For another job to book
 So let's see where we end up next
 Hi, I need assistance
 I'm a 13-year-old girl
 If you would help me I would be so happy
 I would fuckin' twirl
 Got a wagon filled with lemons
 And uh, moving it's a pain
 I need your skills or no one's fuckin'
 Getting lemonade today
 BOOM!
 Our heroes get on the case
 Zarya is lifting up the wagon
 To her fuckin' face
 Everyone is scramblin'
 To clear out any space
 So they can quickly get the payload
 To the meeting place
 Lucio plays some music to
 Calm the girl
 Junkrat shoots grenades
 To blow up a squirrel
 A strangers pulls out his phone
 To call the cops
 Then upon him
 Doomfist "Meteor Drops"
 People are screamin'
 Blood is flyin' everywhere
 Bullets are soarin'
 And zippin' all through the air
 It's a pure bloodbath
 But the wagon's delivered
 Our heroes take their leave
 As Courtney fuckin' shivers
 Another mission successful
 Our heroes always thrive
 Lookee here, another call
 For a payload's arrived
 Hi, can you help me?
 I'm a very old lady
 My shitty hip replacement
 Just ain't enough to aid me
 Your gang looks like a big bunch
 Of sexy hunks of meat
 Now help these 90-year-old buttcheeks
 Get across the street
 Like a lightning bolt
 Tracer's on the scene
 Hold's her hand and says
 "Take all the time you need."
 With little itty-bitty steps
 The mission is clean
 Until it starts to pour
 Completely unforeseen
 D.Va flies above
 And shoots the clouds
 Bullets rain down
 Into every house
 Mei starts a blizzard to
 Stop the rain
 But inflicts upon the neighborhood
 Torturous pain
 To warm the place
 Orisa pierces the ground
 Letting lava leak out
 Spreading all around
 Everyone is screaming now
 It's a horrible sound
 So Lucio DJ's
 To drown it out
 Halfway across the road
 The old lady falls
 Zenyatta throws out
 One of his healing balls
 She smashes her face
 But it's A-OK
 'Cause Ana throws
 A motherfuckin' healing grenade
 Eventually
 They end up getting across
 The old lady's so grateful
 She is at a loss
 Or maybe she's unconscious
 We could never know
 Because onward to their next mission they go!