Moment

Suicidal like "who am I though?
 I fucking hate you" that's my newest motto
 I could choose the change but I choose the bottle
 If I fall asleep I'll see a new tomorrow
 Yeah
 Cause you don't feel the pain that I've been feeling inside
 I'm fucking losing my mind
 They're lookin' at me like I shot the Sheriff
 Cause I got too drunk and I'm not embarrassed
 But I've been depressed and that's not apparent
 Unless I say it out loud, so they all can hear it
 Yeah
 And I don't wanna seem like all I want is attention
 You seem to think I'm pretendin'
 Now all I see is these shards of glass
 So I walk in the bar and I start a tab
 I got a soft soul but a hardened past
 Tell the waiter up front he can call my cab
 I'm a hypocrite, an insomniac
 I'm a piece of shit but I honor that
 I got mental problems and it's got me mad
 But you seem to think that they aren't as bad
 As I think they are
 What kind of Cole is that?
 You don't know what it's like
 You ain't thought to ask
 But you ain't me and you never will be
 The devil inside was sent to kill me
 If you really care I expect the real thing
 I feel they won't ever get the message
 Will they?
 It's all good, I won't get my hopes up
 I'm drunk as fuck but I think I'm sober
 I been all alone lately
 Feel like I might go crazy
 I must the only one that feels this way
 Lock up all the doors baby
 Disconnect the phone baby
 Block out all the noise and I might be okay
 Just let me have my moment
 I really need my moment
 I gotta have my moment
 I really need my moment
 I need a moment of silence
 I found a bottle back in grade seven
 A young desperado, I had to make effort
 My foot's on the gas, not the break pedal
 I just put on ice, so it tastes better, yeah
 I guess I'm just confused 'cause I see all the potential
 But lately I'm going mental (I don't know what to do)
 Who'd a thought that I'd get this nervous
 The lifestyle I lead's not picture perfect
 The hear what I say but they miss the purpose
 Pour the shot in my glass 'til I hits the surface
 That hotter inside I should lift the curtains
 But today I just feel like a different person
 I keep tellin' myself that it isn't urgent
 If you dig what I'm sayin' you should feel my words then
 It's obvious to me that I'm the root of the issue
 Don't make me use it against you (Cause I will)
 Cause when it back fire, it just disappear
 I'm way too anxious, I live in fear
 I see it from a far and it's crystal clear
 But know the objects closer than it appears
 When I'm fucked up I feel okay
 But the next morning there's no way
 That I could feel good and it's so strange
 So I do it all again 'till it go away
 I don't need friends, I got Jose
 And this red cup and this O.J
 It's what it's, it'll take a while
 So I shake these hands and I fake the smile
 I been all alone lately
 Feel like I might go crazy
 I must the only one that feels this way
 Lock up all the doors, baby
 Disconnect the phone, baby
 Block out all the noise and I might be okay
 Just let me have my moment
 I really need my moment
 I gotta have my moment
 I really need my moment
 I need a moment of silence