Animal Magic

At last! A visitor, I'm pleased you've returned
 I've secrets that you need to learn
 Apologies, you had to use complex directions
 but I'm currently avoiding arrest and detection
 Expelled from the roll of clubs and societies
 I've been told I lack sanity? even sobriety
 So don't lie to me, if you need to leave
 I've seen the finest men that need to heave
 The contents of their guts across my hall way floor
 With disgust, so before we take our tour
 Be sure, stay close, extra tight
 Geoffery? fetch our guest a pipe!
 And prepare the lab you wretched tyke!
 Damned monkey butler, best get this right
 Special guests tonight? You're completely certain?
 Then step to the right as a draw back the curtain...
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 This is
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 This is
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 Now, you see
 Ahem
 The myriad wonders of nature it's true
 Can be understood fully in my home made zoo
 By brain swapping with my cranial cutter
 I created my apeish butler
 Like any explorer forging new boundaries
 I found this astounding and took me an owl beak and wings
 Grafted to a tortoise shell
 And now my Owltoise is doing quite well
 No, my Chimpangoat's not the prettiest of creatures
 My Donkeypede has the silliest of features
 My lobsterroos don't like their claws
 My Batraffes do fly into doors
 But until you've heard the Badgermingo sing
 Or fed a tiny fish to a baby Marmoquin...
 My dear sir or madam you've never lived
 It's an impressive gift, so treasure this
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 This is
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 This is
 ANIMAL MAGIC
 Hold for a second - I'm not joking
 This cage should not be open
 My Camelion might be hiding loose
 Oh god, so's the stripy Tigoose
 And yes they're stunning
 And yes they're wonderous
 But they're cunning
 And they might come for us
 If there's rumpus, you're able to run I trust?
 Geoffery - fetch me my blunderbuss
 Oh no! Don't tell me you're using this mutiny?
 I just wanted unity - what will you do to me?
 Trapped. Beheaded
 Oddly sickened
 They attached my head to the body of a chicken
 BAACLUCK! So strange, so odd
 In retrospect, perhaps a mistake to play god...