All the Old Things

Storming through the kitchen just to find a jar of mayo
 While I'm packing lunch for a trip on my Winnebago
 As a kid, made it big, and they all knew me by name
 My old punk rock band got me money and fame
 Hanging out at the golf course on the weekend
 Acting chummy, trading stocks with my best friends
 I had to pick up my prescription at the drugstore
 I remember it's the first time that I realized...
 I'm getting old, and life is a nightmare
 I'm getting old, I just found my first gray hair
 Nobody cares, cause all the kids in today's
 Pop punk scene were born after
 19, 19, 1999
 Woohoohoo, 1999
 I won't say goodbye
 I'm getting older all the time
 And though I'm not as relevant
 My old songs are pretty sweet
 Please don't mind what I'm trying to say cause I
 I like the nostalgia when I hear you...
 ... tell me my band is here to stay
 Even though we don't wanna change
 Modern musicians really freakin' blow
 I was once full of joy
 What happened to Fall Out Boy?
 They're not the band that they once were
 Now they're all superstars, forgot about their guitars
 Those days have turned into one big blur
 Give me a reason
 To go see a doctor
 To schedule a date for
 A prostate exam
 It might hurt to piss
 Doesn't mean that I will go
 You better keep your thumb away from me
 Don't tell me I'm at that age and
 Don't call me old, don't call me old
 Don't call me old, don't call me old
 I don't even relate to the youth
 I don't wanna do the things they do
 I'm never gonna get the memes they make
 And I don't ever wanna, I don't ever
 Wanna be a millennial idiot
 They all like that boy band from Australia
 Why should I cater to their entitlement?
 Those selfish little pampered millennials
 Whoa, you should speak for yourself
 You're not the only old-school Warped band
 Whoa, I'm pushing 30, doing well for myself
 And I'm still pretty relevant
 I got your drift, girl
 Female singer, count me in
 'cause I realize now why all these artists don't end
 Up has-beens
 It might take some time, a little bit of
 Planning with my record label, everything, everything
 Will be just fine, collaborate, with Taylor Swift
 We'll just sell out, sell out
 Drop a song, on YouTube
 You should all sit back, watch closely as I go mainstream
 We're selling out now, and we're changing our sound
 Much bigger than the early 2000s
 I'll chart as number one on Billboard
 I've lost some respect, but I'll just ignore it
 If I could travel time things would get better
 Relive the glory days and rock forever
 Say it ain't so
 It will not grow
 I need a moment
 In the bathroom
 I know I still
 Can be your thrill
 The night will go on
 The night will go on
 My little blue pill