I Pooped My Pants (in a Bowling Alley)

Oh man I pooped my pants again
 Right in front of my family and my friends
 It's not that I have a problem with controlling
 It's just that we were here in this alley bowling
 And I was in the middle of the best round of my life
 I wanted to impress my family and my wife (we've been having troubles)
 It's started when I scored my second strike
 I was in just the kinda rythm that I liked
 That's when my bowels told me it was time to get moving
 I told them to slow down don't mess this up I'm grooving
 I kept getting strikes and I thought I was gonna make it
 But then my bowels decided that they couldn't take it
 I stood there with my cheeks in a tight tight squeeze
 But that wasn't enough cause the poop started dripping past my knees!
 Let it all over the alley floor
 The owner came and told me that I couldn't bowl there any more
 I begged him saying "I'm just two strikes away from a perfect game!"
 He didn't care at all about that, he just called me a nasty name
 And of course now my wife wants to
 go through with the divorce after all
 I guess next time I'm gonna answer when nature calls.